Avid readers of "My Mind: Lifesized" (all three of you) have undoubtedly noticed the lack of musings from me this past month and further, a trend of longer time between posts over the past 6 months or so. I feel bad about that. Frankly, I feel bad because it's not as if life has stopped for me or thoughts aren't racing around my brain anymore, but life certainly has changed since February, that is for sure.
In my own mind I've always thought of myself as a free-spirited adventurer and at some point in the past decade or so I sort of gave up on the idea of settling into a life of marriage, kids and becoming a "consumer". I started thinking more in terms of my future as one filled with loads of solo travel and possibly even becoming a traveling vagabond. I imagined villages and trek's and late nights in new friends homes and ruins and becoming a culture sponge.
Well life is what happens when we're busy dreaming and planning what you want life to be...or something to that effect. So it goes with me. The past 6 months have been filled with life-changing events that have swept me along like a log in spring run-off. It's been scary, depressing, exciting and joyful...all at the same time. In February my life changed dramatically, when I began dating a woman who had been a friend for several years. It was a crazy strange time, as the woman was both still married (although separated) and worked with me (although part-time). Our fledgling relationship was set spinning in April, when we discovered that she was expecting. I still can't put into words the emotions and feelings I know we both experienced that day. Suddenly I went from being the quirky, single guy that had a reputation of not being able to commit to something as simple as a dinner party to being an expectant Dad.
The past 4 months have been an incredible and challenging journey. We've gone from friends to partners, we've decided to move in together, we've battled fears and overcome obstacles and are now looking to the future. She has two beautiful children and they have a committed Dad, so I'm busy trying to find a place in all their lives and discovering how to do that while respecting the role of her ex. Books help, advice helps, but so far it has been most helpful to go with my instinct. Incredibly, all my friends were 100% supportive from the beginning and my family has been unbelievable. It has helped so much to know that people care and support us, especially for her, since her life changed so rapidly and not everyone in her life supported her decision to end her marriage.
And so another chapter begins...today I sold my house and tomorrow I hope to put an offer in on a home that will allow us more space and a location that will work for all parties.
Stay tuned, things will get better and I will post more.